Thursday, June 20, 2013

Unexpected Ending

Two years in a row, something that I had never expected, at the end of the school year, happened.  Relationships.  It blew me away. 

Like many of you educators, I am one of them who try to connect to every student every day, but my effort is fruitless with some students in some days.  With some kiddos, I had no idea why and how else in the world I could make a difference in our relationships.  Tommy (not a real name) has never been sent to the "Refocus Seat".  Rather, he is almost always quiet and seems contained with his charming large eyes unless it is individual work time.  These has been no productive time in partner discussion, independent writing, and math worksheets.  His trimester reading log was empty.  You can easily imagine numeral strategies that can motivate a student like him.  Yes, I tried them all.  None of them worked and I was stuck.  When I visited him individually, he was tearful and whiny sometimes.  "You are mean to make me work."  I whispered, "I am sorry your feel that way.  And thank you for working on this sheet even though you don't like it."  Tommy didn't crumple and throw the worksheet away like other naughty ones do, but he just sat. 

Shortly after June started, I found a kind of stickers that have a chocolate scent.  These were a hidden gem for reluctant learners including Tommy!  Yes, he was caught by my hook.  "Will you save this sticker until I am done on this page?"  he asked.  I replied immediately, "Of course, I will because you will deserve it for your hard work."   It was the first positive interaction between Tommy and me.  He became more productive than ever with a little incentive, but it was already in June.   "I should have used the scented stickers earlier!  The school year would be over in less than two weeks," I blamed myself.  The stickers are only motivation for this intelligent young boy?  It sounded really pathetic, too.  But I had no more time.

All in all, wrapping up, time came up for saying good luck and good bye on the last day.  Numbers of smiling excited children went off from the door right at the final bell.  Tommy was the last one standing in the middle of the empty classroom.   His arms are open as wide as a eagle, walking toward me.  No words.  He just hugged me for a good fifteen seconds.  I felt literally grabbed or squeezed.  I knew it was not just a sticker.  I knew everything I did was not totally useless.  It is "diversity" in communication that every child develops at different paces.  

It is like solving a complicated math problem for hours and days.  Stick with the formula.  Play with it.  See it from different angles.  Keep trying.  Come back later if you are stuck.  Try several strategies that might fit.  Think. Verify.  Its answer blows me away.  It makes sense.  I did it!


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